Sunday, April 11, 2010

My boyfriend's passion

Have you ever been in a situation where you see yourself falling (not literally though) and you can’t do anything about it? Anyone who has fallen in love with a person they know is wrong for them will know what I mean. My story isn’t that simple anyway. Ok it’s like this, I have two friends I spend most of my weekends with. We have been friends from Junior High School and kept in touch ever since. We do the whole ‘girls-girls’ trip to the salon, shopping and even go to some events together. We called ourselves SIL (single independent ladies) until Mimi decided to get a boyfriend! Dennis.

Don’t get me wrong we were happy for her and knew our own men will come by soon but things where naturally going to change. Good things was, there was a lot more to talk about. Mimi seemed so happy, I’ve never seen her happier. Her Romeo was something else. She had one problem though (no, he wasn’t cheating on her) He adored sports, especially football. She usually felt left out when he and his buddies were talking about matches and she just couldn’t understand his passion. I think this is very common and advised her. I said, ‘sweetie there are two ways to deal with this. One, try to learn the game. And two, get yourself busy when there is a football moment. Sadly Mimi took the second option which was to be a joke. You see, my friend just can’t stand being the slightest bit boyish.

Naira who is my third friend is the tom boy and she was even willing to give Mimi a crash course in soccer but she nicely refused so we dropped it and hoped for the best. Weeks later things got a lot worse with the start of a new season. I was happy at first to see her spend more time with us but it was clear she wasn’t happy. She wouldn’t swim when we went to the pool, she would walk straight past her favourite shoe shop without even noticing and she just didn’t laugh much. So Naira and I decided to have a little talk with Dennis so at least he would do something about it. I called Mimi up and invited her and Dennis to a cocktail party my cousin was having. She felt reluctant at first but I told her it was a good way for Naira and I to finally meet her man and she agreed.

Naira and I came early to help out with the party arrangements. We couldn’t help gossiping about how we imagined Dennis to be and how much we would laugh if he wasn’t as ‘charming’ as Mimi described. (It’s a singles thing lol) They finally arrived and I must tell you I was impressed. He wasn’t drop dead gorgeous but he was charming and extremely gentlemanly. The introduction went smoothly and Naira confessed that he seemed just like Mimi described and knowing she was an exaggerator didn’t think it was true. He was funny and friendly but he wasn’t very open. He would smile but won’t talk much. He was a little free with Mimi though but not entirely.

Later that night, somebody wanted to speak to Mimi concerning a loan from the bank she worked for. I kindly stole her away from Dennis and took her over to the person. They had quite a lengthy conversation and when she was done we had a little chat as we walked back to Dennis and Naira. ‘Those Dennis feel uncomfortable here or he can’t wait to go and watch a match?’ I teased. Mimi giggled. ‘That’s the way he is. He only lights up when he is talking about or watching soccer. That’s why I get so upset. It’s like it makes him more happy. He has never lit up like. that with me before.’ She replied. Just then I completely understood her. She had all the reason to be hurt. I put my hand on her shoulder and asked again, ‘do you love this guy?’ The smile that appeared on her face as she nodded was enough of an answer.
When we got back, I was startled. As we talked to the couch Dennis and Naira were sitting on we could hear them talk and laugh. They were talking about soccer players because I could hear Messi and Fabregas in there (yup, I’m a fan too). Dennis looked like a different person. He was laughing and throwing his hands in the air, Naira also. They were sitting so close and occasionally, Dennis lapped her knee as they talked. Honestly they seemed more of a couple. If this was how I felt I couldn’t imagine what Mimi was feeling. She watched as her boyfriend found a lady that shared in his dream and made him happier.

A month later Dennis and Mimi broke up. Naira felt very bad about what happened and deliberately avoided Dennis. I kind of blamed myself for the whole incident because I invited them over. I felt they could have worked things out but everything I hear happens for a reason. This event just thought me one major lesson, know what your partner’s passion is and see if you can deal with it before you get involved. If this isn’t the lesson of the day I don’t know what is.


  1. I agree..

    know ur 'potential partner' before making dem ur partner period.

  2. hmmm,...interesting piece. How about if your partner doesn't seem passionate about anything?

  3. @Setor - eish is that a trick question? lol

  4. On point Julz..Setor as humans,we sure gonna be passionate about something.